Tag Archives: puberty

The appropriate age for a female to marry and bear children according to the Bible.

“Oh My Lord Advance me in knowledge.” (Qur’an 20:114)

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;
 in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” (Proverbs 3:5-6)

﷽ 

One thing one will not fail to notice when reading the Bible is that in some areas God seems very focused on precision.

 The angel who talked with me had a measuring rod of gold to measure the city, its gates and its walls. The city was laid out like a square, as long as it was wide. He measured the city with the rod and found it to be 12,000 stadia in length, and as wide and high as it is long. The angel measured the wall using human measurement, and it was 144 cubits thick.” (Revelation 21:15-17)

 In the twenty-fifth year of our exile, at the beginning of the year, on the tenth of the month, in the fourteenth year after the fall of the city—on that very day the hand of the Lord was on me and he took me there.  In visions of God he took me to the land of Israel and set me on a very high mountain, on whose south side were some buildings that looked like a city.  He took me there, and I saw a man whose appearance was like bronze; he was standing in the gateway with a linen cord and a measuring rod in his hand. The man said to me, “Son of man, look carefully and listen closely and pay attention to everything I am going to show you, for that is why you have been brought here. Tell the people of Israel everything you see.” I saw a wall completely surrounding the temple area. The length of the measuring rod in the man’s hand was six long cubits, each of which was a cubit and a handbreadth. He measured the wall; it was one measuring rod thick and one rod high. Then he went to the east gate. He climbed its steps and measured the threshold of the gate; it was one rod deep The alcoves for the guards were one rod long and one rod wide, and the projecting walls between the alcoves were five cubits thick. And the threshold of the gate next to the portico facing the temple was one rod deep. Then he measured the portico of the gateway; it was eight cubits deep and its jambs were two cubits thick. The portico of the gateway faced the temple.Inside the east gate were three alcoves on each side; the three had the same measurements, and the faces of the projecting walls on each side had the same measurements.  Then he measured the width of the entrance of the gateway; it was ten cubits and its length was thirteen cubits. In front of each alcove was a wall one cubit high, and the alcoves were six cubits square. Then he measured the gateway from the top of the rear wall of one alcove to the top of the opposite one; the distance was twenty-five cubits from one parapet opening to the opposite one. He measured along the faces of the projecting walls all around the inside of the gateway—sixty cubits. The measurement was up to the portico facing the courtyard.The distance from the entrance of the gateway to the far end of its portico was fifty cubits. The alcoves and the projecting walls inside the gateway were surmounted by narrow parapet openings all around, as was the portico; the openings all around faced inward. The faces of the projecting walls were decorated with palm trees.Then he brought me into the outer court. There I saw some rooms and a pavement that had been constructed all around the court; there were thirty rooms along the pavement. It abutted the sides of the gateways and was as wide as they were long; this was the lower pavement. Then he measured the distance from the inside of the lower gateway to the outside of the inner court; it was a hundred cubits on the east side as well as on the north.Then he measured the length and width of the north gate, leading into the outer court.  Its alcoves—three on each side—its projecting walls and its portico had the same measurements as those of the first gateway. It was fifty cubits long and twenty-five cubits wide Its openings, its portico and its palm tree decorations had the same measurements as those of the gate facing east. Seven steps led up to it, with its portico opposite them. There was a gate to the inner court facing the north gate, just as there was on the east. He measured from one gate to the opposite one; it was a hundred cubits. Then he led me to the south side and I saw the south gate. He measured its jambs and its portico, and they had the same measurements as the others.  The gateway and its portico had narrow openings all around, like the openings of the others. It was fifty cubits long and twenty-five cubits wide. Seven steps led up to it, with its portico opposite them; it had palm tree decorations on the faces of the projecting walls on each side. The inner court also had a gate facing south, and he measured from this gate to the outer gate on the south side; it was a hundred cubits.Then he brought me into the inner court through the south gate, and he measured the south gate; it had the same measurements as the others. Its alcoves, its projecting walls and its portico had the same measurements as the others. The gateway and its portico had openings all around. It was fifty cubits long and twenty-five cubits wide (The porticoes of the gateways around the inner court were twenty-five cubits wide and five cubits deep.) Its portico faced the outer court; palm trees decorated its jambs, and eight steps led up to it.

Then he brought me to the inner court on the east side, and he measured the gateway; it had the same measurements as the others.  Its alcoves, its projecting walls and its portico had the same measurements as the others. The gateway and its portico had openings all around. It was fifty cubits long and twenty-five cubits wide. Its portico faced the outer court; palm trees decorated the jambs on either side, and eight steps led up to it. Then he brought me to the north gate and measured it. It had the same measurements as the others, as did its alcoves, its projecting walls and its portico, and it had openings all around. It was fifty cubits long and twenty-five cubits wide. Its portico faced the outer court; palm trees decorated the jambs on either side, and eight steps led up to it. A room with a doorway was by the portico in each of the inner gateways, where the burnt offerings were washed. In the portico of the gateway were two tables on each side, on which the burnt offerings, sin offerings and guilt offerings were slaughtered. By the outside wall of the portico of the gateway, near the steps at the entrance of the north gateway were two tables, and on the other side of the steps were two tables. So there were four tables on one side of the gateway and four on the other—eight tables in all—on which the sacrifices were slaughtered. There were also four tables of dressed stone for the burnt offerings, each a cubit and a half long, a cubit and a half wide and a cubit high. On them were placed the utensils for slaughtering the burnt offerings and the other sacrifices.  And double-pronged hooks, each a handbreadth long, were attached to the wall all around. The tables were for the flesh of the offerings. (Ezekial 40:1-44)

So the above text presents us with a God who seems to be all about precision when it comes to temple measurements.

However, if one were looking for a straightforward answer on the appropriate age for a female to marry and bear children. Here the bible does not give a specific age. In terms of exact precision, you will not find an answer. You will, however, get some clues as to the physical question

“Myriads, like the plants of the field I have made you, and you have increased and grown, and you have come with perfect beauty, breasts fashioned and your hair grown, but you were naked and bare. And I passed by you and saw you, and behold your time was the time of love, and I spread My skirt over you, and I covered your nakedness, and I swore to you and came into a covenant with you, says the Lord, and you were Mine.” (Ezekial 16:7-8)

Chabad.org translation.

I let you grow like the plants of the field; and you continued to grow up until you attained to womanhood, until your breasts became firm and your hair sprouted.
You were still naked and bare when I passed by you [again] and saw that your time for love had arrived. So I spread My robe over you and covered your nakedness, and I entered into a covenant with you by oath—declares the Sovereign GOD; thus you became Mine. (Ezekial 16:7-8)

Sefaria.org translation.

So, in the above passage, God is speaking about a betrothal to the nation of Israel. God is noting the development of breasts and hair. The hair here means public hair. It was only then that God saw that her time of love had arrived. Thus, the signs of puberty were appropriate for betrothal.

“We have a little sister, and she has no breasts. What shall we do for our sister on the day when she is spoken for?” (Song of Solomon 8:8)

The word little in Hebrew is qatan.

Source: (https://biblehub.com/hebrew/6996.htm)

Little here can mean: least, lesser, little one, smallest, one, quantity, thing, younger,

Taking her by the hand he said to her, “Talitha cumi,” which means, “Little girl, I say to you, arise.” (Mark 5:41)

Much of the discussion around age is based upon social constructs.

In the United States, you can be 18 to go to war, fight and kill another human being.
However, you cannot drink a beer until you are 21.

In the United States, it sets 14 as the minimum age of employment. So they must think an individual at the age of 14 is old enough to understand contractual agreements and that if you show up and work on time you will be paid x amount.

In the United States, you legally can leave your home without parental permission.

In Australia and Singapore, the age of consent is 16, meaning that anyone above the age of 16 can legally have sexual relations with a person who is 16.

In the United States, to travel abroad one can generally be 14 or 15. If you are younger
You will need a letter from a parent or guardian.

In the United States, most states make it illegal for anyone under the age of 18 to be out later than 10pm or 11pm on school nights.

Age at which someone can be tried as an adult in the United States. Some states allow minors as young as 10,12 or 13 to face adult charges.

Christians when they assail Islam do so under the pretext that one of the wives of the Blessed Prophet (saw) was prepubescent. Although they bring up age as if it is a factor. So if the individual is pubescent, then what?

Thus, any supposed argument they have against Islam collapses.

May Allah (swt) guide them out of the darkness and into the light.

May Allah (swt) forgive the Ummah. May Allah (swt) guide the Ummah.

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

The appropriate age for a female to marry and bear children according to Quran only

“And those who no longer expect menstruation among your women-if you doubt, then their period is three months, and those who have not menstruated. And for those who are pregnant, their term is until they give birth. And whoever fears Allah-He will make for him of this matter ease.” (Qur’an 65:4)

﷽ 

The Qur’an — like the Bible, does not set down the age for marriage.

“And those who no longer expect menstruation among your women—if you doubt, then their period is three months, and those who have not menstruated. And for those who are pregnant, their term is until they give birth. And whoever fears Allah—He will make ease for him in this matter.” (Qur’an 65:4)

The above verse can be used to suggest that a person can marry a girl who has not even had menses.  In science, one of these terms is called Amenorrhea.

As long as there is ovulation, a woman can still get pregnant. 

Again, the Qur’an does not give a definite age requirement. It simply gives some guidelines.

For example:

“Test the orphans, until they reach balaghu; then, if you perceive in them the right judgment, deliver to them their property; consume it not wastefully and hastily ere they are grown. If any man is rich, let him be abstinent; if poor, let him consume in reason. And when you deliver their property to them, take witnesses over them; Allah suffices for a reckoner.”(Qur’an 4:6)

This text says nothing about the age of marrying any female. It is simply stating that their property will be held in trust until two things happen.

A) Is that the female is balaghu. Says absolutely nothing about what age would be appropriate for marriage.

B) That this female can have her property delivered to her when you ‘perceive in them the right judgment’.

The word balagha comes from the root word blgh, which means ‘to reach’ or ‘to attain’.  Today it is used to reference eloquence in speech. Or at the very least, being fluid in speaking. 

People try and make what they perceive to be a logical jump by surmising that if one has to be in ‘the right judgment’ to take ownership of property, that this implies somehow a female who is a ‘teenager’ or ‘young adult’ would also need to be in ‘the right judgment’ to bare children.

Well, according to the designer Allah — who knows best — that is not the case. Insh’Allah, we will discuss this further down the article in the section on analyzing this through evolution.

We think of nothing more insulting to women than to ask them to take an IQ test to determine cognitive awareness. Before we get married, we need you to take a test to determine the following:

  1. Your ability to reason.
  2. Memory — ability to recall information.
  3. Problem-solving skills.
  4. Verbal ability.
  5. Mental acuity.
  6. Spatial awareness

This cruel interpretation of the text would not allow for vulnerable women to get married. We are talking about women with emotional disorders (there are an array of them).

Abu Musa narrated that :
The Messenger of Allah said: “There is no marriage except with a Wali.”

Source: (https://sunnah.com/tirmidhi:1101)

What is interesting about the above hadith is that the Hanafi school understands this to refer to the above category of women (vulnerable women due to various facts) as a nikah is a contract and she can:

 a) have a guarantor for her marital contract — a wali 

 b) not have a guarantor for her marital contract. 

Orphans are not necessarily people with no assets or no wealth.  Maybe not appropriate here, but no one thinks of Bruce Wayne (the character) otherwise known as ‘Batman’ as someone with no wealth or assets. An orphan, rather, is someone (anyone) who, if they do not have guardians and guarantors, can be taken advantage of. 

Note the following verse:

“And as for the wall, it belonged to two orphan boys in the city, and there was beneath it a treasure for them, and their father had been righteous. So your Lord intended that they reach maturity (ashuddahuma) and extract their treasure as a mercy from your Lord. And I did not of my own accord. That is the interpretation of that about which you could not have patience.”(Qur’an 18:82) 

ashuddahu comes from an Arabic root meaning fully tight, a rope that is pulled from both ends so that it is firm and not loose. (Indicating that they are now standing straight on their feet)

The following verse dispels any idea about females needing to be in ‘the right judgment’ to bare children.

“Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has made one of them to excel the other, and because they spend their means on them.” (Qur’an 4:34)

Also, notice something else about the text above in “let him consume in reason” — maybe a poor man who has taken in orphans that he has a right over some of their property/wealth in reason. It does not specify any amount. This is delegated to an authority outside the Qur’an. If there is any dispute, an arbiter or legal authority will be brought in.

“O you who have believed, let those whom your right hands possess and those who have not [yet] reached puberty among you (yablughu l-huluma minkum) ask permission of you [before entering] at three times: before the dawn prayer and when you put aside your clothing [for rest] at noon and after the night prayer. [These are] three times of privacy for you. There is no blame upon you nor upon them beyond these [periods], for they continually circulate among you — some of you, among others. Thus does Allah make clear to you the verses; and Allah is Knowing and Wise. And when the children among you reach puberty(balagha l-atfalu minkumu l-huluma), let them ask permission [at all times] as those before them have done. Thus does Allah make clear to you His verses; and Allah is Knowing and Wise.” (Qur’an 24:58-59) 

There are several keywords one can look into in the above text:

Aftal-meaning children or toddlers. 

Balagha hulm (it is tied with the wet dream) is a sign of puberty. Why do you think the word hulum, which is connected to dreams, is connected with balagh?

Qur’an 21: 5 & Qur’an 12:44

Balagha (eloquence and clearness)
Bulugh (a boy or a girl reaches the age of clarity)

These two words above have the same trilateral root in the Arabic language and are closely connected together.

A Muslim preacher absolutely shuts the Christian antagonist down with one simple question.

We love Brother Sabeel and his gentle character. (We pray that Allah continues to bless and support him.) This video we feel was a missed opportunity to both capitalize and educate Christians on a fundamental point that they constantly use to assail the Blessed Messenger (saw)

Now notice that this man is quite combative. His body language, invading personal space, everything about him is combative.  He is trying to corner this Muslim brother, Sabeel Ahmed, over the age of Ayesha (ra)

Sabeel Ahmed is, of course, one of those Muslims who are apologists who often don’t state plainly their view on something. Now notice that @14:30 the whole flow of this exchange completely changes for a moment.  Once, the man made the mistake of saying ‘according to this book (the Bible), marriage to a child is wrong.’  Sabeel asked him simply to show him where this was stated?  Show him one verse.  The man IMMEDIATELY disengaged eye contact and turned towards the other man.

Sabeel Ahmed (May Allah bless him for his efforts) did not do three things here.

  1. Point out that getting married does not equate to consummation in the marriage. For example, Louis XVI and Marie Antoinette did not consummate their marriage for seven years, to cite a famous example.

In many parts of the Indian subcontinent—Hindu, Buddhist, Jain, and some Muslim communities—historical child marriage did not mean the couple began marital life immediately.

Instead, it typically involved:

Marriage ceremony (vivāha / nikāḥ) at a young age

A purely social and ritual event intended to “join the families” or fulfill cultural norms.

Gṛha-praveśa (the bride entering the husband’s home) years later

This was the actual start of married life.

Consummation only after puberty

Consummation was normally delayed until the bride reached maturity.
Many communities explicitly forbade cohabitation or intercourse until then.

This is actually from the Qur’an.

“There is no blame if you divorce women before the marriage is consummated or the dowry is settled. But give them a compensation—the rich according to his means and the poor according to his. A reasonable compensation is an obligation on the good-doers. And if you divorce them before consummating the marriage but after deciding on a dowry, pay half of the dowry, unless the wife graciously waives it or the husband graciously pays in full. Graciousness is closer to righteousness. And do not forget kindness among yourselves. Surely Allah is All-Seeing of what you do.” (Qur’an 2:236-237)

It should be noted that in Islam the schools of jurisprudence need consent from the woman or they need her not to object. Consent is not something attainable from a child. 

2. He didn’t stay focused on that point! 16 minutes of intense discussion, and he let that man right off the hook. If he could get the man to admit that the Bible does not give an age for marriage, he could have:

3. Ask the man on what basis he objects to it?

SCIENCE / EVOLUTION — on what AGE is appropriate for a female to bear children.

Let us say, for the sake of argument, that you put aside religion and culture for a moment. Let us argue from the perspective of biological science. According to evolution, when is a Homo sapien female able to have a child? 

“That was the Way (sunnata) of Allah in the case of those who passed away of old, and you will not find any change in the Way (lisunnati)of Allah.” (Qur’an 33:62)

So, whatever comes about that is also corroborated by science is something that Allah has decreed. We believe there is no Muslim who would dispute this.

https://www.webmd.com/children/children-no-period-15#1

The opening article says:

“Girls usually get their first menstrual period when they’re 12 or 13. It’s a sign that your body is maturing, so that one day if you want to, you should be able to have a baby.”

So, for all the atheists and agnostics and those who decry that there is no objective morality and yet attack Islamic oral traditions that ascribe to the Blessed Messenger-saw that he married a female at a very young age, it should be noted that nature has determined that the moment a female has menses and produces eggs -she can have a baby.

There is no one that can dispute this.

That means that if we completely remove religion from the picture, nature—aka—evolution has decreed that a human female is viable to propagate her species at a certain age range.

It has nothing to with education, it has nothing to do with mental capacity and everything to do with her ability to have children.

So the Qur’an does not give any particular requirements or age. This is left up to good common sense, and what is appropriate from one culture to the other.

We have even had conversations with U.S. Americans about the appropriate age for people to be together, and they were all over the map.

However, what we did find interesting is that, among progressive /liberal types in the United States, all types of couple arrangements are acceptable, such as LGBT, people who are swingers, or share their partners, etc.

Yet, they really do frown upon age disparity. Whereas in Asia we have seen and witnessed very often 10 and 15 year age gaps between couples.

Al Pacino (81 years of age) started dating Noor Alfallah (28) when they started dating back in 2022.

A picture of the couple together. (https://people.com/al-pacinos-girlfriend-noor-alfallah-relationship-blossome-like-film-school-8604715)

Elvis Presley was 24 when he started dating Priscilla Presley, who was then 14. The People of the United States loved Elvis and his music and people at the time were not outrated over the apparent age gap.

A picture of the young couple together.

https://www.elvispresleymusic.com.au/pictures/photos-elvis-priscilla-lisa-marie.html

Final Thoughts. People have taken this whole age of Aisha (ra) and made a mountain out of a molehill. This is likely due to conditioning and social surroundings. It is interesting that this is not a Jewish objection or a Hindu objection. In other words, it is interesting to know which cultures have objections to which things and why.  We would encourage you to read the comments on this article and the exchange we have had with others. As mentioned, the number of Muslim men we have personally encountered that are married to a female under the age of 21, let alone 16 or 12 is 0. When something like that does happen, it becomes international news as if an airplane went down in some remote part of the world. Islam gives some parameters on the basis for a male or female to be eligible for marriage. It does not give any artificial boundaries.

We have personally asked: “Your daughter is 18 and a man who is 45 has an interest in marrying her. Do you let it transpire?” His response was a resounding no, and that tells you all you need to know about the artificiality of such positions to begin with.

As regards the hadith on the matter, they are ahad dhani, lone narrator reports, which means it is speculative in nature. 

The hadith could be true and Aisha (ra) could have simply guessed her age. Some people in our team have met Indonesians who are not certain of their age due to not having birth certificates. One could claim they are 17, yet in reality be 14. One could assume they are 11 and in reality be 13. 

This article claims up to 25% of children in Indonesia do not own birth certificates. This also complicates matters for those Indonesian women wanting to work as domestic helpers over seas. Agencies require certain age requirements and this often becomes difficult to ascertain with 100% accuracy.

https://govinsider.asia/intl-en/article/a-quarter-of-indonesian-children-dont-own-birth-certificates-government-reveals

This is why you get mature academic discussion from in traditional Islamic circles on the matter:

https://primaquran.com/2023/06/06/shafii-muhaddith-salah-al-din-al-idlibi-questions-age-of-aisha-in-bukhari-2/

You may also be interested in reading:

https://primaquran.com/2022/10/04/the-age-of-aisha-and-the-highly-detailed-quran/

So there is wisdom in the Qur’an leaving these matters to time/location/custom/culture.

And Allah knows best.

May Allah (swt) Guide the Ummah.

May Allah (swt) Forgive the Ummah.

17 Comments

Filed under Uncategorized